About Male Entitlement*
*Not all males are entitled all the time.
Trigger Warning: So many caveats it will make you sick, recklessly long-winded sentences, mean woman being not nice and unkind (for shame!)
I have recently received some feedback from some non-subscribers about the way I refer to men*1 as a collective. As my behavior has been unkind, I thought I would take these suggestions into account in today’s essay, as a form of apology. Today’s (relatively short2) essay is about male entitlement.*3 (Please note that not all men are entitled all the time.)
*Not all men are entitled all the time.
As a budding feminist writer, I have been focusing my efforts on addressing gender-critical issues and focusing on the needs, the rights, and the safety of girls and women. I now see, however, that I have been blind to an important demographic. I would like to apologize to all the men4, all the males5, all the men-males6 out there for hurting their feelings. I intend to do better and this essay is my apology to you all. Thank you so much for bringing this to my attention.
I see now, in my attempt to be accurate and avoid extraneous information, I have been very unfair to man*7 feelings. I am so, so sorry that I have hurt you. I will do everything in my power to make you feel better, and to ensure that my writing, from here forward8, takes your thoughts and feelings into consideration, even though I am a feminist writer writing in my own personal blog to other feminists about feminist issues (not that it’s any excuse to not consider men*9’s feelings!)
*Not all men are entitled all the time.
I’m sorry to have to say this, but, well, I’d like to suggest that maybe, if you come to a feminist blog, the writing that the women do there might be, maybe, intended for women. Maybe. I’m sorry. Let me try this another way. This is not a place for worrying about emotions of men10 so much as it is about worrying about lived realities of women. Sorry, that sounds so mean. I’m so sorry.
I guess I’m just not very good at this “being kind” thing.
Now, not all men**11 are entitled all of the time.* This is really important for us to establish before we continue. Men** are good, and they don’t mean to be entitled, so don’t be upset with them for their possible entitlement, which may not be entitlement.12** But also, even when I’m talking about men** being entitled, I need you to remember that I’m not talking about all men** all of the time, because not all men** are entitled all of the time.**13 Let’s continue.
* This is really important.
**Not all men are entitled all the time.
Any woman who is honest with herself and with you can provide at least several instances of how male entitlement*14 has perhaps, maybe... I’m sorry. Maybe the entitlement of some males*, but not all of them*, has impacted her life in some ways. (But not so much that you need to worry about it. I don’t want you to feel bad.) Today I’m going to talk about what happened to me recently, a little bit, if that’s okay, and how it is ironic in that some male entitlement* was present, but likely not involving all of the males* present, because not all males* are entitled all the time. But there was some entitlement that impacted me1516 in some way.
*Not all men are entitled all the time.17
I restacked a note that has been making its way around the gender critical spaces, which features a photograph of a trans-identified man18 named Giselle Byrd, on the Massachusetts Commission On The Status of Women (MCSW) that looks more appropriate for a stripper’s online bio than it is for any position asking for respect.
I pointed out that the use of this photo in a professional capacity is an example of male entitlement. This is when I was informed that my disregard for men was apparent: I did not qualify the phrase “male entitlement” with “trans”. To be fair, this is an instance of a trans-identified man displaying entitlement. You would even be correct in saying that this particular instance of entitlement would not have been possible had the person been “cis” - the lie that this person is a woman is what is allowing him to be entitled in this case. Still, there is nothing so unique to this situation as to warrant a qualification be attached to “male entitlement”. To wield power the way this man did is male entitlement. Full stop. No qualifiers needed.19
Ways in which this entitlement was “male”:
no consideration was given to the wants or needs of women
power and recognition meant for a woman was given to the man
the man assumes he knows what is best for women
the man thinks he can represent the women he is meant to without being anything like them
the man is given unearned power and supported by both sexes
the man’s power allows him to use an inappropriate “official photo”
the man’s photo is a reminder to women that the rules don’t apply to him
the man is allowed to wear what he pleases while women’s dress is highly restricted
the man is acting in a way that gratifies him sexually without the consent of those around him
the man is showing off his serious lack of taste in a world full of reasonable and pleasing fashion choices
probably some other shit I’m too lazy to think of
Ways in which this entitlement was specifically “trans”:
the man claims he is a woman and is pretending to be one
the man was given his position in at least some part due to his identity
the entitlement took place while wearing “feminine clothing”
Trans-identified men are only granted the power and privilege they are because they are men. This is why their gender identity is of more concern than women’s privacy and safety. They’re men who manage to get victim-hood status over women, but their entitlement is still male.*20
*Remember that not all males are entitled all the time.
All of that being said, I’m just a silly woman with a silly woman brain. Is there a man out there who could confirm that the above is correct?
I think now is an excellent time to remind my readers that not all male entitlement is being enacted by all men all the time. If there is anything you take away from this, please let it be that. We need to protect these precious man-feelings, lest we drive more of them to red pill ideology and men’s rights bullshit. I cannot have that behavior on my conscience.
I would like to suggest something, if it’s okay. Perhaps showing up to a place that is intended for feminists and demanding that they change their (not inaccurate) language to spare your feelings, as a man, is male entitlement.* I might be wrong. Please do tell me if I am, any men who are out there. Kindly ensure that you speak slowly.
*Not all men are entitled all the time.
May I suggest that maybe there is a time and a place for specification and this isn’t it? Maybe there’s something you don’t understand about this that I do. (I know. That would be im-fucking-possible.) Perhaps you are so busy trying to cover your shame that you don’t see what an unfair request you are making of me. Or perhaps it’s that blasted male entitlement.*21
Maybe I purposefully omitted the word “trans” to make a point. (Hint: I did.)
*Not all men are entitled all the time.
I’m sorry to be so upfront about this. I know I’m not a very nice lady. It’s probably because I haven’t fulfilled my destiny as a human incubator22 and there’s an emptiness inside of me23 that nothing but man-hate will ever hope to fill. I don’t even like cats, so who am I going to spend my spinster future with?24 This is all I have, really.25
I’m just trying to say, ever-so-gently, that there is a time and a place for “kindness in clarity”. I don’t owe it to men and boys to ensure my feminist material is palatable for them. To insist so might just be another example (or not) of that silly old male*26 entitlement, but I’m probably wrong because I’m just a woman.
*Not all men are entitled all the time.
BONUS MATERIAL
Check out this asshole:
If you actually give a fuck - lose the serious attitude and read my essays.
(But you don’t. You’re just looking for an opportunity to feel, and perhaps appear, superior.)
To my beloved readers:
Until next time, stay guilty of thought crimes! *
MadFem XX
*And please remember that not all men are entitled all of the time.
Who may not be entitled!
You’ll thank me.
Not all men are entitled all the time.
Who may not be entitled!
Who may not be entitled!
Who may not be entitled!
Who may not be entitled!
At least, in this essay…
Who may not be entitled!
Who may not be entitled!
Who may not be entitled!
Not all men are entitled all the time.
Not all men are entitled all the time.
Not all men are entitled all the time.
I am so sorry.
I probably deserved it.
I cannot stress how important this point is.
Who was entitled, but that doesn’t mean any other men are entitled
I’m really sorry!
Which may be enacted at any point, but not all points, all of the time because not all men are entitled all the time.
That you don’t have all the time, but may or may not be having at any given moment
Best fucking decision I could have made.
phrasing
I’m not single, and of course I’m going to have dogs instead.
I don’t actually hate men but they truly do like to insist on changing that fact.
Not all men are entitled all the time.
You’re hilarious and smart but what would I know? I have a small and smooth lady brain🤣
This is some of the funniest stuff I have ever read. Wish I could help you with your questions, but all I have is a lady brain too. 🤷♀️ sorry about the spinsterism / lack of cats situation. That sounds rough. Too bad you couldn’t be a nicer lady, things might have worked out better, oh well.